Archive for April, 2008

School Pics

April 24, 2008

Yes, we finally have had a sunny day, and I have had a bit of free time, and the result is… VISUALS for YOU!!!

The front circle, looking out from a third-floor window at my school.  Nice green mountains in the background, and still a few blossoms on the trees…

…and another view.

The front of my school.  There’s the Hamster on the right…

…and another view of the front, with the Hamster on the other side.  Am I artistic, or what?

Bike parking!

Here’s the back.

What, don’t tell me your school didn’t have a deck!  Ours does… as well as these cheery little murals and colorful flower beds.

More to come later… back to work for me!

 

Natto… d’oh!

April 22, 2008

Today, a short story about natto (nah-toe)

Iä! Shub-Niggurath! The black goat of the woods with a thousand… er, sorry.  This is natto.  Pic swiped from Wikipedia…

 

              Natto is one of the great “Foreigner Joke Foods” of Japan.  A Foreigner Joke Food, or FJF, is a food item that is not really eaten by anyone, but exists merely to test the mettle of visiting foreigners.  Other examples from around the world include Vegemite (that great black vegetable paste from Australia), salmiak (the wonderful ammonium-chloride spiked black licorice from Scandanavia / Continental Europe), lutefisk (fish and lye… mmmm… from our friends in Norway) and perhaps the “slider” hamburger in the USA.

 

              I’m kidding, of course.  Natto is a healthy, nutritious, low-calorie food item.  Also, somebody somewhere might actually find it palatable.  Maybe. 

              Natto is made from fermented soybeans.  Like yogurt, cheese, and potato chips, it probably started as a mistake.  Like yogurt, it has lots of beneficial bacteria.  Natto has the consistency of chunky snot, stinks to high heaven, and produces little sticky streamers that snap off and adhere to everything.  You can mix it with vegetables, tofu, and / or mustard (a waste of perfectly good vegetables, tofu, and condiments IMHO) or eat it straight.  

 

              If you lack a Japanese grocery store near your home, you can approximate the experience of natto with the following handy recipe:

 

Jeff’s Not-Natto Simulation

 

Directions:  Take a week-old pair of gym socks, ball them up and insert them into your ripest, most unbearable pair of sneakers.  Soak the sneaker / sock combo in bog water for a week.  Retain the resulting liquid and boil it until reduced to a paste.  Mix with liberal amounts of white glue.  Pour over chunky stuff.  Take a deep whiff.  Yum?

 

               Yes, the closest olfactory analog to natto is old shoes and sweaty socks.  What makes it worse than that?  It tastes as bad as it smells.  What makes it even worse than that?  The texture is indescribably uncomfortable.  Imagine eating a giant plate of moist toenail fungus (okay, okay, I’ll stop.  I hope no one is reading this over lunch or dinner).   

             

              So there I was, one day last week, with natto looming on the school lunch menu.  I wasn’t looking forward to it.  I was dreading it, in fact.  But I would be tough.  I would eat it and like it and NOT be a wimpy foreigner!

 

              The day arrived.  I eat with my students, rotating classes every week.  However, instead of serving myself with the students, I pick up my lunch from the teacher’s room, where the lunch lady doles out the portions for the teachers.  Seeing as how I’m a giant foreigner-type thing, the lunch lady assumes I eat approximately thirty-seven times as much as the average human.  Thus, I went to grab my tray… and there it was.  A veritable mountain of natto, staring at me like something out of one of H.P. Lovecraft’s more twisted fever-dreams.  I grinned gamely and picked up my tray.  That day, of course, the principal, assistant principal, head teacher, and head administrator were all sitting up front in the office and watched me go past. 

             

              “Hey, Jeff.”  The principal asked me, “Can you eat natto?”

              Ah, the dreaded challenge of the FJF, thrown right in my face!  I picked up the proffered hankie.

              “Yes.”  I replied, confidently.  A chuckle went through the room. 

              I exited the office and immediately ducked off to the side, where they couldn’t see me through the window, and made a beeline to the lunch cart.  I opened the natto tray (the containers sit on the cart to receive leftovers) and shoveled in two giant gobs of the stuff (hey, I said I would eat it, just not a Mount Fuji-sized portion of it)…

              Then my students came out of their classroom just down the hall and saw me.  They called to me.  I was caught.  I couldn’t get rid of any more of it without appearing to cheat.

 

              So I took what I had left over (still considerably more than the typical student portion) and strode to class 3A. 

              I sat down.  Lunch began.  I took a dollop of the stuff (trailing streamers of eldritch goo), placed it on my rice, picked up the dollop of natto with an equal-sized dollop of rice, and placed it in my mouth… and found myself magically transported back to junior high school.  No, not the lunch room… the gym.  Specifically, the locker room, at the end of a summer’s day…

             

              Yuck. 

              I swallowed three mouthfuls like this. I then decided to thoroughly wimp out, because I figured it was much better to swallow my pride than to spew in front of half of my third-year students.  Speaking of whom, every single last student in my group were eating theirs with no complaints.  Maybe it’s not a FJF after all… in any case, I was chagrined and defeated and all that, and ashamed of my earlier bravado. 

             

              So I ate everything else, all the while recalling and utilizing every trick I learned in kindergarten to make it seem like I ate more of my yucky food than I actually did.  I compacted and piled the natto.  I strategically placed my rice bowl on my natto plate so that it hid most of it.  I was safe… now to slip out and hit the cart on the way back to the office…

              …and there went the cart, being wheeled down the hallway.  Seems lunch ran a bit long in this class, and my perfect getaway had left without me…

              So I was first up at the front of the class, using their cart… while the students busied themselves getting their desks in order, I rushed to the front.  One flick of the wrist later and the evidence was gone, anonymously deposited in the leftovers receptacle.         

              I was free. 

             

              Until the next time they serve natto, of course… 

 

Pretty Little Cemetery

April 17, 2008

Masako and I went to visit the cemetery where her grandmother and grandfather have their marker stones.

In Japan, you must by law be cremated (space considerations).  Most of the ashes are then held by the family in the family shrine, where observances are held throughout the year.  The marker stones shown here are the physical, public monument.  In the Buddhist tradition, when you pass away you are given a new name… thus, it can be hard to find a person’s grave site unless you know what their new name is.

Here’s the little country road that leads past the cemetary.  Masako’s grandparents’ house still stands nearby, though no one lives there now. 

More to come soon.  Thanks for checking back!

Welcome to School

April 16, 2008

Iiiiit\'s... THE HAMSTER!!!

 

 

I present… THE HAMSTER!!!

More pics to come soon, now that I know how to insert them!

 

 

I continue to write this blog on the fly, in a guerilla sort of manner.  There’s still no internet connection at our apartment, and it may be awhile before we get one.  I’m writing these entries in Word, putting them on a thumb drive, going to internet cafes (399 yen an hour) and surreptitiously plugging them into their computers when they’re not looking (the rules forbid downloading and uploading of files, as well as the plugging in of strange equipment), opening Word (which the internet café computers all have, for some odd reason), copy text, open the blog, copy, paste, and post.  There’s probably an easier way, but I’m not tech-savvy enough to figure it out.

 

 

No internet connection yet?  Why, you ask?  Well, it has a lot to do with the Byzantine nature of a lot of Japanese institutions.  Here, you have to own a phone line (which costs $1000 and is transferable).  Luckily, my company owns several and assigns them as needed.  Once that’s accomplished, permissions must be exchanged on all sides and an agreement signed.  Then it takes them two weeks to get you your modem.  I have no idea why.  The process is further being held up by the fact that I’m a foreigner and I need an alien registration card to get a modem.  But I don’t have my card yet, because it takes them a month to issue them (again, I’m not sure why).  Etc.  Round and round. In any case, expect irregular updates and few pictures until I can do this from the comfort of home.  At the latest, it might be mid-May before I’m fully up and running.

 

Why not just find a nice wireless hot spot, you ask?  Because there aren’t any.  In Toyota, especially, it seems that public wireless internet has not yet caught on. 

 

And now, a few words about my new school…

First, a bit of an explanation about Japan’s municipal reorginization.  I’m teaching in Toyota City, which always conjures up images of vast factories and city bustle.  In the center of town, this is totally true.  However, a few years ago, Japan embarked upon an ambitious consolidation plan to reduce the number of municipalities.  In 2003, when I left Japan the last time, there was something like 6,000 cities, towns, and villages.  The plan was to reduce this to 1,000, with the thought that it would streamline bureaucracies and allow the smaller and remoter villages to get more in the way of big city money and services.  What happened, essentially, is that cities absorbed the small towns and villages around them.  As a result, for example, the town where I was teaching before, Fukuoka, no longer exists except as a sector of Nakatsugawa city. 

 

The same thing happened in Toyota.  It absorbed a lot of small towns, including the village of Shimoyama, which bears zero resemblance to the idea of a “city”. 

 

Shimoyama has a single highway that runs through the center, one lane each way.  From the center of Toyota, it is a steep ascent, up into the mountains, with lots of fun hairpin turns that make even the most staid driver feel like a rally racer.  Mountains and valleys alternately rise and drop on both sides of the road.  There is really nothing that could be called a “center” of town; the buildings are scattered in a thin strip along both sides of the road, along a ten kilometer path.  The drive is pleasant and green, with cedar, blossoming cherries (in the spring) and wild bamboo springing up on steep inclines and around long, narrow little terraced rice fields.  Side roads, one lane wide, take you further up the mountains, some eventually connecting with other roads on the other side, some running off into driveways and leading to individual houses, and some going nowhere in particular, ending at dirt footpaths or sudden, abrupt ends that leave little room to turn around. 

 

Eventually, (just past the Circle K and Shell station) you turn left up a 10% grade and arrive at the front gates of Shimoyama Junior High School. 

 

Like most Japanese junior high schools, it’s three stories high, with each grade on its own floor (higher grades on lower floors… one of the perks of seniority is not having to climb so many stairs).  The current structure was put up sometime in the 1970s.  The villages of Japan were the last to abandon the old wooden school buildings erected at the turn of the century and go for something that’s frankly a lot less charming; a rectangular, concrete structure with good functionality but zero curb appeal.  It frankly looks like something designed in the Soviet bloc; most Japanese buildings erected post-war up until the mid-80s share this unfortunate resemblance.     

 

Shimoyama, being far out in the sticks, has plenty of land and room to breathe, so the campus is spacious.  A circle drive leads to the front doors where teachers and guests enter (students enter from the other side and down a ways, past the community kitchens and next to the bicycle parking spot).  The gym sits in front, framing the circle drive, away from the rest of the school building, connected by a long corridor.  An immense (especially for Japan) dirt sports ground is shared with an elementary school across the way, and dirt tennis courts project out opposite the school office windows.  Additions made in the last ten years have added a new meeting room and library, which are a lot more attractive and exude more warmth than the rest of the building.      

 

The walls are all concrete, the floors in the classrooms well-worn hardwood, the hallways linoleum.  Sliding doors lead to the classrooms.  Like most Japanese schools, there is no heating and no air conditioning (the teacher’s room has both, but neither is on during regular school hours, in a show of solidarity with the students).  Some schools in extremely hot climates might have air conditioning, others in extreme cold might have heating systems, but most make do with body heat in winter and lots of open windows in summer.  From experience, I will say that sharing a smallish room with 30+ students does tend to be plenty cozy in the winter.  In the summer, the whole school can be opened to the point where it is basically one big semi-enclosed porch.  The building profile is thin- the whole is one hallway and one classroom thick.  Open the hall windows facing the front of the school, open the windows between the hall and class (running the whole length of the inner wall), and open the classroom windows facing the back, and the whole school becomes one big breezeway.  With the humidity I would never claim that it’s comfortable, but it is at least tolerable.

 

The only other feature of the school that Westerners might find unusual is the long, trough-like stone sinks that run along the hallway walls, one in front of each classroom, with about twenty taps each (cold water only).  These are used for various purposes, mostly for cleaning the school, which happens every day after sixth period.  Students go to various lockers situated throughout the school, arm themselves with brooms, mops, rags, and sponges, and proceed to their assigned areas to give the school a thorough cleaning.  The sinks are also used after lunch, as every student is required to bring a toothbrush and brush their teeth (most of the teachers do this, too). 

 

Most schools in Japan serve lunch in the classroom.  There is usually a central kitchen that services all of the schools, with the meals being trucked to the various buildings.  We’re lucky in that the central kitchen happens to be adjacent to the school, connected by a corridor.  At lunch time, each class has a group of five or six students on lunch duty (responsibility rotates throughout the year), who don white coats, hair covers, and white masks (sneeze guards) and go retrieve a huge metal cart from the kitchen loaded with buckets of soup, covered trays and bowls of rice, salad, meat, etc. and wheel them to their classrooms (there are large dumbwaiters that take the carts to the second and third floors, where the students retrieve them).  After years of this, I still think it looks funny; the kids look like surgeons who are retrieving experiments from a cryogenics lab or something…

 

 

The lunch group then serves the other students and all sit down to eat.  Teachers eat the same lunches as the students.  Homeroom teachers eat with their classes (in Japan, the students stay put while the teachers move around, except of course for classes like gym, science, etc. where specialized rooms are utilized).  Most of the other teachers eat in the staff room.  The lunches are actually pretty good.  They are, however, designed with the nutritional needs of growing bodies in mind and tend to be rather high in calories. 

 

My students wear uniforms, of course.  For formal occasions (assemblies, etc.) they have their dress uniforms.  The boys have the classic military-look jacket with big brass buttons and black slacks; the girls have the classic sailor top and skirt.  Most schools choose navy; my school was smart and chose black for the girls’ uniform (it looks a lot sharper) with double white pinstripes around the collar.  For everyday wear, though, the students wear their jerseys- sweat shirt and sweat pants.  In the summer shorts and lighter tops will come out.  The jerseys are an eye-bleeding shade of sea foam green… a hue so intense it’s hard to look at.  So when I’m in a class with almost forty students, and everyone is wearing one… ouch! 

 

Thus concludes my overview of school life.  More to come soon. 

  

Oh, What a Feeling…

April 8, 2008

              The first week in Toyota has gone smoothly, for the most part.  We live in a nice area.  It’s a newer part of town.  If I turn right out of our parking lot, the road leads to the center of town and every convenience that implies.  If I turn left, within five minutes I’m out in the countryside, with all of the peacefulness that implies. 

             

              Masako and I saw an odd sight indeed the other day on our way to the local department store.  Traffic going the other way was at a dead stop.  Something had fallen into the roadway and spilled… a plastic barrel.  We could not see what the contents were, but they were shiny and apparently whipping around on the pavement, blown by the wind… then Masako got it. 

              “Eels!”  She said.

              Yes, it was a barrel full of eels, three feet long each, which were now wriggling in the roadway.  The truck that dropped the barrel was coming back, and I assume they all got put back in their barrel. 

 

              Another odd sight- on my way home from work the other day, I saw an old man walking slowly along the side of the road, using a cane.  He had a package of some kind tucked under his arm.  As I drove past, I could see it was a large, white, live rabbit. 

 

              THE HAMSTER

              Speaking of small beasts…

              Our car, provided for us by my company, has been duly named thus, both for its size and for its basic physical resemblance to said tiny mammal.  The Hamster is a 2000 Daihatsu Mira, a kei-jidosha (small car with engine displacement under one liter… in this case, 660 cc).  It’s a 3-cylinder 3-door with an automatic transmission.  The equipment package is odd.  In most respects, it is a real stripper (AM-only, single-speaker radio, vinyl floor, manual locks, no airbags, no antilock brakes, no grab handles and only a driver’s side sun visor (!).  It does have power windows, though (thankfully… I couldn’t roll down the windows with a crank, as my leg would definitely be in the way) and it came with a set of snow tires.  It is also a hatchback with a fold-down rear seat, and it gets us where we’re going… so we love it! 

              I can fit into it, though it’s tight.  One thing that’s nice about modern cars of all kinds is that they are usually bubble-shaped to some degree, which gives the driver and front seat passenger a good amount of room.  It may seem impossible to believe, but I actually have more leg room in the Hamster than I did while sitting in a late 90s Buick Roadmaster.  Sure, the Roadmaster had more overall interior room.  Sure, I could stretch out on the front bench seat and take a nap if I wanted.  But in a driving position, it had an overhanging dash that bashed into my legs, forcing me to drive bow-legged.  The Mira does not have this problem.  The space is narrower, but longer, which makes all the difference.  I have to say, though, that I probably look very silly trying to fold my 6’6” frame into it when I get in. 

              The car handles decently, though it tends to understeer.  It’s also the lightest vehicle I’ve ever driven, by far (the Mira weighs something on the order of 1200 lbs), so it tends to get blown around a bit on windy days.  It has a turn radius to die for, though… I can make a quick U-turn on almost any road.  The tires are tiny… they look like the kind you’d find on a golf cart.  Driving over a curb by mistake is thus a traumatic teeth-rattling experience rather than a mere bump.     

              The engine is what it is… tiny.  No pick-up, and driving up on of Japan’s many steep inclines can be a little scary (can’t… go… over… 45 kph…) with traffic behind you.  As long as quick starts are not what you need, though, it works just fine… and it is easy on gas, too.  The Hamster seems to get about 50 mpg under standard conditions, which in Japan means lots and lots of stops and starts, inclines and declines, tons of curves and generally low speeds.

 

              More to come next time, including a first look at my new school.  Until then, take care, everyone.